Summertime, and the Living is Easy

My sister (rightly) commented yesterday that I only blog when I need to work through something, or unless I'm miserable. And while I think that's absolutely a common theme for writers - the best artists die young and miserable - I thought I'd try to write "happy" for a change. I did it a little in New York, but that was such a melancholic happiness that it absolutely worked anyway.

I've come back to such a comfortable equilibrium. I feel assured of my position at Drip - there are bumps and brief frustrations, but it's the kind of frustration that is right and healthy in the service industry. If it were always smooth and simple, something would be terrifically wrong. The minute everything becomes smooth is the moment that I've become complacent, and until then, the rocks and bumps push me to become faster and better.

Today was my first day off in a short time - maybe a week and a half? I spent it napping and thinking, cuddling with the dogs, and spending time with family. The time I spend with one dog behind my knees and another cradled to my chest just reminds me that I've done something incredibly right. When we came home from vacation and I was happy to be back in my house going to my job, I realized that I'm immensely lucky. But it's more fun to live that kind of love than it is to write about it, see. Will I at some point start to get scared that I'm throwing away my potential again? Absolutely. But this is an easier form of misery than that previous job.

Right now, the extent of my restlessness is trying to figure out where the next piercing should go. My ratio requires one more piercing before I can hit that next tattoo. Both of them are starting to itch at my mind - in small part because of the number I see every day at work, in some part because I can feel things shifting inside me. It's time to stretch my canvas. I don't paint, so I pay other people to paint on my canvas for me.

Maybe I need to stretch in another way too - start thinking about things the way I used to, ready to store pictures for later writing and use. It used to be easy for me, but after I graduated, something sort of turned off for me. I need to figure out how to re-inspire myself, or at least start to see things the way I used to.