At this exact moment in time, everything feels right. It's a combination of many elements - most of which I won't detail - that leaves me waking this morning feeling like things will be okay. Probably even better than okay: that things can be, maybe are, and certainly will be beautiful. Part of this newfound contentment is that I've hammered out an issue of uncertainty in my future, and heaven knows how much I hate not knowing what my future will hold. I have an apartment in Columbia lined up. It is neither large nor particularly inviting, but it is a place to come home to, a place to call my own, a place that is not my parents' house (no offense, wonderful parents!). Already I can feel a weight lifting off my shoulders. It makes my return seem more concrete and immediate in all the right ways - although I've just now started learning how to have some fun in this city, and I'll probably establish myself just as I'm leaving, knowing that there's a space for me at home makes the month somehow look less daunting.
Maybe one of the foremost things that I'm learning this summer is that, in the end, the people in your life are what enrich it. To some extent, I thought in Columbia that I was established enough to accomplish that by myself, but I've quickly been taught that it's the people that matter, not the situations or even the locations. Even everyday interactions with the servers that I've bonded with - these are some of the things that keep me sane. Just knowing that I'll be recognized somewhere is an incredibly comforting sentiment. Were there to be a graph, charting my enjoyment of the city with the number of people that I've actually spent time with, there's a clear correlation - it was when I started hanging out with co-workers and servers that just a little bit of the depression started to break. Whether that says something negative about my personality or not - that's another discussion.
There are mornings when I wake up knowing beyond doubt that I'm cared about. It's great to know that, even this far away from home, I've got the love and support of people who would basically do anything for me. There's something to be said for going to sleep with the assurance of affection, and waking up with it reaffirmed - last night I fell asleep warmed even by words, from miles and miles away, that could demonstrate love in ways that amaze me. I'm incredibly grateful for these moments, feel my best when warmed by these sentiments. When you find people who can offer you that kind of love and affection, I feel like you can safely count yourself one of the luckiest people on earth.
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